Breaking: Latest Footage Shows Adolf Hitler Is STILL ALIVE

Adolf Hitler is an Austrian-born German politician who was the dictator of Germany from 1933 until 1945. Presumably, people thought he died. However, recent evidence from California shows that he’s still alive and well, drinking a cup of cum while jerking off to gay porn. His immensely small penis is thought to have been the result of his dog chewing his ‘sausage’.