Cara Quinn has contracted AIDS

Cara Louise Quinn, 13, of Newry, has contracted AIDS. The teenager is said to have many sexual partners, the majority of them being older women, also known as GILFS. We at Channel 46 News managed to capture a picture (above) of the teen after announcing her AIDS crisis on Reddit. When asked if she regretted sleeping around so much, she said “Double you tee eff, of course not. This is my life and I shall bang with whoever I please.” She then upvoted a revolution post against the Irish National Anthem. “God save our gracious queen” is Quinn’s slogan. “We can’t seem to stop her from scoring it into desks in the H6 Geography room.” – Ms Nadine Gallagher, Quinn’s form/geography teacher, near tears.
Many have asked on Reddit who Quinn contracted her AIDS from. Many tenuous speculations have been made about Quinn and Emily Casey, 13, of Newry, but have been dismissed due to lack of evidence. “It’s a terrible situation. It really is. So many teens in Newry have just been, pardon my language, whoring about like it doesn’t matter. I think Quinn’s case will teach a lot of young teens that sex is a big deal.” -Michael De Higgins, President of Ireland. Quinn will appear in court on the 19th November 2021 to plead her case, as having AIDS is now illegal in Newry. Perhaps this will teach these teenagers a lesson.