Local Golf Icon Ethan Evans Caught with 30 Pounds of Columbian in Attempted Raid.

“When you shoot for the king, you better not fuckin miss” – Adolf Hitler. Local Amarilloan Ethan Evans was caught impersonating a policeman trying to seize 30 pounds of cocaine from a rival gang. We asked for a statement, and all the upstanding golfer and citizen had to say was, “The Lord has shined down upon me. When you cut off one head, 2 shall take its place.”