Early yesterday morning, a man by the name of John Smashworthy was rushed to hospital. And it was all to do with a singular Lego brick.
He claims to have woken up around Five Oclock in the morning, reciting his early routine – Making coffee, having breakfast and cleaning his teeth. However, his cheerful morning would come to an abrupt stop when he approached his childrens toy room.
“There he was, the little bratt. Sitting there. Playing away. Only four mind you, but up this early? No way. It’s not good for him! So I says….”Oi Daniel…come here mate….it’s okay.” And he just…..he nods his little head. So I say “Right you listen here you little shit!” “.
It was then that John approached his younger son Daniel, before stepping on a stray Lego brick which was embedded in the carpet, but now embedded in his foot.
“FUCK! SUCK ON YOUR COUSINS LEFT TOE YOU FUCKING SLUT BURGLER! I says. Then, Daniel starts crying. He runs off back to his room. Wife comes out. Here we go, I’m in the shit, but notice there’s a Lego in my fucking foot! So I show her. Next thing, she calls the ambulance!”
The ambulance arrived on the scene and found John bleeding quite heavily all over the carpet. They loaded him on a stretcher and into the back of the truck, before driving off to the hospital where his wife and children are now waiting with him. We hope he recovers soon.