Cat attempted to eat owner

On Sunday July 26th, tabby cat, Roofles, attempted to eat his owner.

Roofles’s owner, Mary Maybell commented from her bed in the hospital that Roofles had been acting strangely all week, and had gone on many trips to the hospital in the past few months.

Mary claimed she would not get rid of the pet, but rather give him many cuddles, so he knows his “mama loves him.”

The cat was taken in for examination, and doctors learned that it had come in contact with a new desiese, newly named by Doctor John Bennett; Cattus desiese.

Mary died of her wounds this morning at 9 am.